tonight's reigning thoughts

Obama has 207 Electorals. you all know how i feel. and how strongly i feel. so now, to be myself and not mask it, i am going to post what i wrote earlier (at 11:PM).


~ Election Night 2008 ~ I BELIEVE IN A BETTER WAY
i just popped out to the Thomas Kemp to pass a bit of time outside my flat and to have a pint.
i am so overwhelmed with an odd feeling. odd is the only way to put it.
besides the stress and simple sadness i feel, being ready to go home, i am at odds inside.
i feel, in moments, looking now into the crowd of english, more of an outsider and even outside of myself than ever. i am alone in my nervousness, excitement, and underlying doubts.
i feel like i am watching it all unfold before me. as though 'it' and 'i' am not real... i am helpless. but i guess that's what happens when you believe in something (or someone) so completely.
with all that you have, you believe and so you are wrapped. bound up in the thing.
at its mercy. faith has a price. i believe and therefore i am bound.
no matter which way the pendulum swings i am in it deeply.

the dylan song, With God on Our Side, keeps going through my head...
no matter the outcome of tonight (really) 'it' will have quite a lot to say about "Our God."
A. neoconservative, right wing, evangelical B. liberal, left, Christian, Buddhist, Hindu, Agnostics A. Israel, Iran, the Middle East peace-talks B. ignore. conquer. bomb.
A. Powerful. Wealthy. B. Wealthy. Powerful. A. Black. B. White
A. Country First (or government?) B. People First A. Reformation Change and Progress for the better way B. Hold steady Form and conserve for ... what?
which side do you suppose He is on? i can assure you i don't know. i hope His people's. i hope it's not about 'sides.' i hope it's not red or blue, black or white.
i hope it's about being a better place, a better race, a better human race.
i hope for truth. i hope for peace. i hope for change. i hope for me...
cause i believe in a better way.